Saying See You Later to Toronto - Debunking the Cliche of the No Regrets Lifestyle

Everyone likes to say they live life with no regrets.  I used to be one of them, but, frankly speaking, I only mean it about 80% of the time.  I think this is still a pretty decent rate though! As mentioned in the previous post, I made some decisions to go to Japan in a certain way, and executed much of the preparation in a relatively short period of time. 



I left Toronto with the following regrets.  Some of these are touristy, some serious.

 

1. I never went to the CN Tower.  This was the one touristy thing I never did.  Mainly, I wanted to do the CN Tower because I wanted to do the Edgewalk.  Being from the prairies, I have never been in a building that is very tall.  I have also never been skydiving, bunjee jumping, nor have I really challenged myself in terms of heights.
2. I never went to a Blue Jays, Leafs, Argos, or lacrosse game.
3. I never got a chance to learn how to figure skate at the Cricket Club.  Due to my school schedule, I never did any of the adult learn to skate classes I really wanted to.  However, I did buy a pair of skates that fit properly and went to the public rinks a few times.
4. I didn’t visit the Royal Ontario Museum.  Not once in the two years I lived in Toronto.  I’m kind of ashamed of this.
5. I did not get the chance to hang out with many of my friends that lived in the area as often as I would have liked.  I know that it was a busy time in my life, but I still regret it.
6. I never spent a full day in Niagara Falls.
7. Being so close to Pittsburgh, I never took the opportunity to visit nearly as much as I should.  Moreover, I really wanted to visit before I left the continent, but just didn’t have the time.
8. I didn’t get the chance to say goodbye to many people in the way I would have liked.
9. I didn’t explore Toronto’s walking/riding trails as well as I wanted to.
10. I didn’t explore as many different neighbourhoods as I wanted to.  Little Italy, I’m looking at you!
11. I’ll be honest…I did not experience the musical growth I wanted to achieve when I went to Humber.  More on this in another post.  I do not regret going to Humber, but I wish I had planned the experience better.
12. Overall, I did some cool and productive things in Toronto.  But in general I felt spread a bit thin, especially towards the end.  I do want to give living in Toronto a second chance someday, and hopefully rectify this list!

Japan: Prelude

So, I moved to Tokyo from Toronto eight months ago to teach English.  I still get asked why quite regularly. 

I loved living in Toronto.  I've always felt a connection to the city, and, after two very cold Saskatchewan winters in 2008 and 2009, was ready to make a change in climate.  Also, I felt that I was losing my way musically, and thought that it would do a lot of good to study jazz and seek out different perspectives and try new approaches.  So off to Toronto and Humber College I went.   I kept myself very busy in Toronto.  Too busy, in fact.  I was going to school, teaching private woodwind lessons at two different music schools, and waiting tables to help pay the bills.  I was on the road to another burnout, and knew I would have to make a change.  I was also in a long distance relationship that was going to become a super long distance relationship in June of 2012 when he moved to Japan. 

When people hear the last part, I often get asked if I moved here mainly to be with the boyfriend, which is a fair question.  It was an incentive, and I loved him very much.  Moving to Japan was the only opportunity in the foreseeable future to eliminate the long distance aspect of our relationship and the stress that came with it.  The stress that came with the lifestyle described above did affect our relationship, and I did want to put a stop to it.  However, it was not the main reason I moved to Japan, and, had I not found the job I did, I would not be here.  

More importantly, I wanted to teach or do music full time.  Any musician knows how difficult the latter is, especially when you have a student debt load in the tens of thousands.  The situation for teachers in Ontario was starting to head south in a serious way, which put the notion in my head to look for a teaching position in Japan.  I've always wanted to know more about Japan, and love Japanese contemporary classical music (with thanks to the legit saxophone literature).  Also, the prospect of having one job that took care of all of the bills was very appealing.  The idea of having one or even two days off in the week, possibly even having more time to practice music and pursue hobbies was also a selling point. 

So, I applied to various companies at the end of March, and got offered a teaching position serendipitously near the boyfriend in mid-April.  I moved out of my Toronto apartment at the end of May.  I had a brief stint in Saskatchewan searching for suits, visiting friends, and dealing with interesting, complicated, and emotionally draining family dynamics for a few days, then flew to Tokyo on June 5th. 

To anyone interested in teaching English in Japan - even though it's possible to make a big move like this in less than six weeks, I wouldn't recommend it!  I worked a lot of twelve and fourteen hour days, had no time to study Japanese (which I strongly suggest!), and apart from an amazing farewell party, did not get to see my friends and family much at all before I left.  I got my visa paperwork at the end of the day on the very last business day prior to leaving Toronto.  One thing it was not - boring nor dull!

Also, I could not have done it without some amazing people in my corner.  My good friends and colleagues Laura Pettigrew, Rick Morrell, September Russell, and Kevin Hrycay sang my praises in just the right way as work references.  I would not have gotten many professional opportunities (including this one) had I not had these wonderful people in my life.  My friend and now ex-roommate Chris McInnis helped me wrap up much of my life in Toronto and is taking care of my awesome cat Madison while I'm away.  Ultimately, my mother - though I know this was not what she would have chosen for me - has been there for me no less than 200% throughout the whole process. 

So, with some good old fashioned long term sleep deprivation and a seat kicker sitting behind me during the entire flight to Narita, I was on my way!

Welcome!

Welcome to Frank Tracey's Honesty Box.  I have been wanting to blog for a long time, and I am happy to have the space to finally do so!  My reasons for starting the Honesty Box are many.  First, I miss writing terribly.  It was my favorite childhood hobby and I gave it up to pursue my primary passion:  being a musician and educator.  Second, I want a forum to document my life and travels in Japan in more detail than Facebook would allow (and in a much more aesthetically pleasing way!).  Third, I have many interests, from figure skating to languages to baking, and like to talk about them!